Travel is a complex topic these days. People, especially the primary caretakers of the house- women, are terrified. Even the thought of wanting to go for a trip fills them up with guilt. They feel they are being irresponsible, not prioritizing well. Ask any woman, - Will you go for a solo trip or stranger travel like earlier times? You will see that the eyes and lips do not match the answers with expressions. Though women want to go, take that damn break, the shackles of responsibilities pull them down.
Generations are witness to the inheritance of guilt that women are grown up with. During your teens years, you are shown how to behave like a lady and not be yourself. In your early twenties, you are asked to act coy, not letting your true self grow. You are now being submerged, but that’s how women are brought up hey! Even when the pandemic was not in sight, how comfortably did you travel? Carrying only clothes and essentials and not guilt and shame.
Due to this, guilt has become a woman’s default emotional mood. The constant pressure to be perfect, to be an ideal woman, daughter, wife, mother, just gets to them. Isn’t it?
Let us take the pandemic as an example.
Women are multi-taskers, but in this pandemic, all hell broke loose. Some women felt, they were caught between the devil and the deep sea as on one end, it was their job and the pressure of salvaging it and one end, the home, online classes, food, no help aid and whatnot.
For women, staying all alone and managing everything took a toll too. Being away from your loved ones and not being able to move around closer to them isn’t an ideal situation either.
For those women, who stay with their spouse with no added responsibility, felt the mundane routine to be quite taxing.
All the above scenarios, do not fit well for your mental health, not to mention the litres of guilt waiting to ooze out.
Earlier, you needed a break, so you took one. Now, you most definitely need a break and your guilt is pulling you back.
What should you do in a scenario like that?
1. Understand your guilt. Whether it is personal guilt, professional guilt or just everyday guilt for not being good enough according to your standards.
2. Cut yourself some slack for being too harsh on yourself.
3. Practice gratitude and be kind to your needs.
4. Don’t think of society. It’s a one-way streak.
5. Replace negative self-talk with positive self-compassion
To take a vacation now as the pandemic settles, you may meet eyes calling you reckless and careless. But should that fill you up with guilt and not take that trip anyway? Your fears are justified. Who will look after my home, my work, but hey, who will look after you too? Your fears are justified, but responsible vacation by weighing the risks and benefits is the alternative answer too.
It is not just about travel. It is about everything; you wish to do. Even if it’s a girls night out, learning a musical instrument, work trip over a week. Unfeel the guilt.
Respectfully, it is not anybody’s business, judging you and drowning you in guilt for taking that break.
Do we know where all the virus is? No.
Do we know how to look after ourselves and take care? Yes.
What feels okay to you, may not feel okay to others. And that’s okay. As many men, that many minds.
Before the guilt kills you, travel, take the break. Take that trip. Of the many guilts that women face in a lifetime, the guilt of choosing yourself should not be one. Though the trip may seem non-essential right now, once you take it and are back, you will Thank yourself.
THANK YOURSELF, Soon.
Image courtesy: Google Images.